“Be good when you get out there, okay?” Warder Lisa said to Judith.

“Hmm” Judith said quietly, as she held the small box containing her most treasured possession in the world which contained her tennis shoe, diary, a pair of jean and a cardigan.

“Alright then, Judith” Warder Lisa said, opening the wide huge Prison gate “I don’t want to see you back here” She said to her, smiling.

Judith reluctantly stepped out of the gate; fear and uncertainty settling within her. She was leaving the only place she called home after having been sentenced to fifteen years in prison for murder. Even the breath of fresh air didn’t feel refreshing to her; it was strange and felt different.  She stared at the long stretch of road before her and had no idea which way to turn. She had been transferred from the Foston hall in Derby to the Holloway prison in London five years ago to spend the remaining time left in her sentence. She watched the people outside the gate who were glad to see their families been released. They wasted no time getting them into their cars and driving away. Few minutes later, Judith was left standing there all alone except for a car which was less than a mile from where she stood. She wondered if they were still waiting for their loved one to be released. While her thought was still playing on her mind, she noticed a lady walking towards her out of the car.

“Hello Judith” the lady said.

Judith stared at her and couldn’t recognize the face.

“Hi, I’m Alex” the lady said.

“Alex!” Judith said confused.

“Your pen pal” Alex said.

“Oh! I thought you were a guy” Judith said, embarrassed.

“Oh no! I get that a lot with the name” Alex said.

“Hmm, what are you doing here?” Judith asked looking around to see if any inmate were left to be picked up. “Are you waiting for someone?” She asked.

“No, I’m actually here to pick you up” Alex said smiling.

“What?” Judith said surprised. She wasn’t expecting anyone to come for her. After all, in the fifteen years she spent in prison, she never had any one come to visit her until few years ago when she started to receive letters from some pen pals but the only one who continued to write her was Alex. Although, she ignored the first few letters and never replied but Alex was persistent; writing her almost every month to ask about her welfare, what she was doing and her plans for when she finally gets out of prison. After a few months, Judith took interest in her letters and looked forward to getting one each month, even though she still did not reply them. Alex did not give up but continued to write her stories about the outside world; she also told her a lot about God and his wonders which Judith did not give so much thought to.

Now, for Alex to have come to pick a total stranger who was jailed for murder was a completely unimaginable and daring gesture.

“What?” Judith said again staring at her.

“I realized you may need a ride back into town so I thought I may as well come pick you up” She said. “C’mon, let’s get going” Alex said to her offering to take her box which Judith held onto tightly.

“Alright then, I’ll be in the car” Alex said, walking back to her car.

Judith hesitated at first but found herself following behind her; after all, she had no one in this world that cared enough to pick her up; her own mother had out-rightly disowned her after she stabbed her husband to death.

They drove quietly in the car for a couple of minutes. Judith wanted to ask Alex why she came, what her motives were but she was so fascinated by the pictures and people on the street that she had no time to chat. She had gone to prison at the age of fifteen and seeing a lot of changes was quite overwhelming. Once in a while, they had been privileged to watch TV, use the internet and read newspapers back in prison but nothing compared to seeing them in reality.

“Would you like to eat anything before we drive down to Essex?” Alex asked.

“What?” Judith said, as she was jolted out of her ecstasy.

“I asked if you would like anything to eat before driving to Essex.” Alex asked again

“No, I’m okay. Thank you” Judith said to her. “How do you know that I live in Essex?” She asked, curiously.

“Well, I read your story” Alex answered “Hope, you don’t mind” She said.

Judith chuckled. “Uh, why would I? Anyone is privileged to that information and I’m sure they will take so much interest and pleasure in a fifteen-year-old accused of murder” She said angrily.

“I’m sorry; I just wanted to get familiar with you?” Alex said

“Why?” Judith said confused. “Why would you? Is this like a charity organization or what?” She asked angrily.

“No…”Alex responded quickly. “I just took interest in your case after reading an article about you few years ago” She said.

“Interest? Who are you? Mother Theresa?” Judith said. “You know what, stop the car” She shouted. “I actually do not know what I’m doing here. I do not want your pity and I am not a case you can study for your own pleasure” she shouted as she tried opening the car which Alex quickly parked at the side of the road. Judith immediately got out and started walking away.

“I’m not sure why you are angry but really, I’m sorry if I said something wrong. I was only trying to help” Alex said, trying to stop her from walking away.

“I’m not a case study!” Judith shouted

“I know” Alex said. “Please, I understand this is strange for you but trust me, I only want to help you. Alright, why don’t I drive you to your house or if you want, you can stay with me for a few days before you settle down” Alex said.

Judith stood there staring at her. At that moment, she realised that she actually had nowhere to go even her mother’s place was not an option. She couldn’t understand why she was angry at the only person who had taken time to speak with her all these years and was willing to help her. Somewhere within her was a connection to Alex after all the years of reading her letters, but a part of her was not ready to trust anyone.

“Alright, I’m sorry, you know…….” Judith apologized.

“It’s okay, I understand” Alex said.

Alex made the rest of the journey back to her house in silence; she avoided speaking so as not to agitate Judith. She showed her to the guest room and made her dinner to eat in the room. Judith wanted to take a shower but wasn’t sure if she was to ask for permission or not; she had lived all her life been told what to do and when to do them including answering nature’s call.

She lay back in bed staring into the ceiling thinking about her past.

Judith lived with her mother; Anna all her life before the whole incident that led her into the prison. Anna who continuously faced the many struggles of single parenting had to drop out of school to take a full time job, and it indeed was a hop from one job to the next to make ends meet. She tried dating so as to have a man to look after her daughter and herself but no one was willing to marry her with her child except for Segun. Anna told him about her fourteen-year-old daughter the very day they met; she was tired of giving her all into relationships that always came to an end for the fear and reluctance of taking another man’s responsibility but Segun was different. He wasn’t bothered by this, in fact, he proposed to Anna four months after that and finally got married to her. Anna was so happy about this. She finally was somebody’s wife and Segun had willingly taken the burden of caring for her and her daughter.

Judith’s nightmare started one night, when her mother left for a night shift at work. She thought she was imagining things when she felt her duvet been pulled at by a firm hand in the middle of the night. She finally opened her eyes and standing right in front of her was her step father, Segun.  She wanted to scream but he covered her mouth with his huge hands, she tried to scratch him but he was too powerful for her. She tried screaming in between his hands, but her throat closed around the sound.

“Keep quiet” He said.

Then, she felt a sharp object against her neck. He had a knife.

“Please” Judith cried. “Please, don’t do this, don’t hurt me” She said in tears, trying to stand up.

“Be quiet girl” He whispered in the most annoying voice.

Then, he pushed her back into bed, his hands to her mouth and showed her the knife again.

“You know I can hurt you, in fact, I can kill you” He said jeering at her “But if you are quiet and do as I want, then I won’t” he said

He took his hands away from her mouth and started to take off her night gown. Judith was shivering and shaking all over with stream of tears running down her eyes which did not bother him as he undressed her and drove himself into her. After he was done, he jeered at her and left the room. Judith cried out in pain. She looked down on her bed and saw blood; fear and shame came all over her. She was scared and terrified; she hastily locked the door behind her even though she knew that didn’t keep him away in the first place. She took her phone and called her mother, she was screaming and shouting at the same time but Anna shouted back at her warning her to stop making up silly stories. She probably just had a nightmare since Segun was not supposed to be home that night; he had a night shift at his security job and she had just finished talking to him at his work place.

Anna called her a liar and said she was trying to ruin things for her. She claimed Judith had always been the one pulling her down all along, and now when things were beginning to get better, she was trying to destroy it also. Judith was so dejected at this; even her mother did not believe her. She cried even harder and felt so much shame and detest for herself. She went into the shower to try to wash his smell and touch away from her but each splash of water brought back the ache and pains. She grabbed the bed sheet and hid it away.

When her mother got back from work the following day, she didn’t bother to check up on her or to talk about the incident of the previous night.  From that day, Judith resolved to protect herself come what may; she was done with depending on and trusting her mother to protect her.

After that incident, Judith always slept with an eye opened, a pair of scissors under her pillow and her door tightly locked from inside. Few weeks after this incident, she suddenly opened her eyes and found her step father in her room again. He was trying to cover her mouth but she stood up immediately grabbing the pair of scissors under her pillow.

“What are you going to do with this?” he mocked as a very offensive laugh spilled from his lips.

“Don’t come near me” Judith raged at him.

“Really?” He responded still laughing.

“I mean it” Judith said pointing the scissors at him. “I will not let you do this to me again, not now, not ever” She cried out in fear.

“I will do anything I want with you girl” he said going further towards her this time. He roughly overpowered her, took the scissors away from her and pinned her down to the bed. Judith screamed and cried out but his grip was too strong for her; she begged him to stop but he laughed at her as he raped her again. After he finished his ugly act, he left her with bruises and tears running down her cheeks. Judith was so angry and got suddenly overpowered with a strong desire for revenge. She had promised herself that he would never take advantage of her again, so she carefully went into the kitchen, and took the sharpest pointed knife she could find. With each calculated and determined step, she walked into his room. She watched him for a while snoring away in his sleep with utter disgust and hate in her heart. Without thinking for another second, she got on top of him and drove the knife into his chest, stabbing him, screaming and shouting all at once. She felt the pain and bitterness surge through her each time the knife drove into his flesh.

She finally ran out and had no idea how long she took in the shower soaked in tears and blood from her just concluded act of judgement until she siren blare jolted her back to reality. The police men broke into her door, how they got wind of her act she never could tell. After a few days of questioning and investigation, with evidences including the murder weapon and trace of blood that led to her room, she was charged with his murder and sentenced to fifteen years imprisonment. The day of the murder was the last day her mother ever spoke a word to her and in fact she was not at any of her court proceedings.

………………………………….To be continued in the next issue.